Pick Up Artist Tips: How to Approach Women
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So having developed and practiced a bit of material at home, how can you take this into the field? The first step any wannabe pick up artist should take is to build confidence and overcome approach anxiety. The good news is there are some very easy ways to destroy approach anxiety and the easiest is to rule out any delays BEFORE YOU START.
So what do I mean by this. Well, genuine players should always observe the 3 second rule. That is to say they should act virtually immediately once they see a woman they would like to try and pick up. By doing this, you act before your mind can come up with a load of negative points and fears about approaching a woman or more importantly, what will come of it.
This means that you go into your ‘first contact’ without any mental baggage cluttering your game. This approach to approaching is often referred to as Kamikaze, but either way, with a good stack of pre-practiced material, you should be able to start stringing together a good conversation that you can lead.
Another key component of improving your game is to make sure you are not putting the cart before the horse. The way you are going to become an effective pick up artist is by realising that your objective is to get the woman attracted to you. You are already attracted to her so the last thing you need to worry about is letting her know that! You need to get the outcome of the interaction out of your head.
If you enter into a pick up routine and underlying all your conversation is an obsession with how things will work out, it will outshine your performance and ruin your otherwise slick ‘presentation’. It takes time and practice but it is the only way you will have enduring success. This is why you’ve gotta get out there and approach lots and lots of women – WITHOUT worrying yourself about whether you are going to get laid!
To draw an analogy, it is a bit like playing a platform computer game where you get past level one, then get stuck on level two until you figure out how to get past that, then you get stuck on level three and so on. Approaching a woman is the level one of our game and you need not concern yourself with how you will get past level 15 yet (ha ha)!
So, in order to increase your chances of getting past level one, you need to come across convincingly and authoritatively. You need to be an alpha male! What is it that makes a male ‘alpha’.
The alpha male is a persona that women fall for. He is funny, carefree, confident, cocky, challenging and above all, a leader. These characteristics are the ones that will make any woman want to be around you. These characteristics take you from being any guy to being a man that a woman might aspire to be with and this is incredibly important when you want to meet the hottest women.
The thing with hot women is they get approached all the time. As a thing of beauty, a women will have learned from an early stage that most men will do whatever she wants. This makes ‘most men’, boring and unattractive. What she finds attractive is a man who challenges her and will not roll over just because of her beauty.
Alpha males do not roll over.
There are so many things that you can learn about how to portray an alpha male and improve your chances with women that I cannot possibly fit them into this article. If you want to know more about improving your approach skills I heartily recommend The Art of Approaching as a great place to start. For improving your status with women, I absolutely recommend John Alexander’s Become and Alpha Male
Pick Up Artist Secrets: The best pick up line in the world
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If you are serious about being a pick up artist, you must know the best pick up line in the world so here it is: “Hi…”
WTF? I hear you say. Yep, that’s it: “Hi…”
So let me explain; pick up lines whether they are cheesey, lewd, rude or just funny do not work! Talking is all you need to do. It is a complete myth that you must start any conversation with a women with some canned pick up line that you are supposed to deliver naturally. All quality pick up artists know this.
The thing about an obvious pick up line is that it puts a woman in the driving seat immediately by letting her know you are interested in her. This immediately removes any doubts she may have about whether she could ‘have’ you. She now knows that to her, you are cheap. She could click her fingers and you would be doing whatever she wants.
Secondly, if the pick up line is a well worn old favourite, she also knows you are not terribly creative which indicates you might be a little boring or worse, dim. These are not qualities she is looking for.
Thirdly, having revealed your interest in her and indicated you are mentally challenged to the point you can’t come up with something original, you are now in a completely defensive position in the conversation. You have handed her the high ground that you want to conquor and that she will more than likely not give up.
The secret to being a good pick up artist is knowing that you must coerce women into picking you up. To do this, you must be a challenge to her, not a footstool. That is what the pick up line makes you. So do you want a real answer to the question, “What is the best pick up line in the world?” The answer is conversation – plain old conversation.
Women like confidence, humour, sincerity and integrity. These qualities can all be conveyed in general conversation with out some jaunty little one liner. Sure, open with a joke but make it uncontrived and pertinent to the moment or the environment. Telling her that her father was a thief “because he must have stolen the stars from heaven and put them in her eyes” just will not do!
If a woman thinks you are ‘just talking’ then she will be more relaxed and more receptive. When she is at ease, you can make her laugh and get her to be interested in you. These are not something you can do with a ’sales pitch’ chant up line.
Pick Up Artist Tips: Equipment List
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Any pick up artist worth his salt knows there are a few tools of the trade that he must keep at all times. These will prove invaluable to ensuring that every opportunity is exploited to its maximum potential and thus rewards will be maximised for the hunter!
Items that help you strike up a conversation are always useful; things like a lighter can be invaluable. In this day and age with smoking bans all over the place, going outside for a cigarette is a good meeting place for people. Flirting and smoking has even got a new word for itself: “smirting”. If you are walking past a public building there is a good chance someone will be smoking outside and there’s a good chance there will be a potential target. Using your lighter is a great way to break the ice.
A camera can also give a pick up artist great opportunities to start up conversations in a completely innocent manner (great!). If you are with a group you can ask your target to photograph you (which is also a great way to take your target from her group of friends) and then ask for a photograph with her (which then leads onto compliments etc. etc.).
You should also always have a means of getting a phone number. A pen and paper or a cell phone can work wonders here. If you have a cell phone you can type in your number on her phone and just ring your own. This will give you her number and the opportunity to play a joke when saving it with a name (e.g. Kylie Minogue or some other babe) and also the chance for you to save your number to HER phone. This means that not only can you contact her, but if she liked you, she might start hunting you – bonus!
The fourth thing you should always have is some mints or gum to freshen your breath. We all get bad breath at some time or another so being able to sort that out at a moment’s notice is an absolute must or you will crash and burn. Pick up artists know this and eliminate the risk constantly.
Finally, the aim of being a pick up artist is not to take these gorgeous ladies home to see your mum is it? Always carry condoms for your own sake and particularly hers. You are the one planning on meeting loads of girls so there is a good chance you’ll have some bad luck at some point. Take the appropriate precautions – plan ahead!
Pick Up Artist Tips: Smile her pants off!
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OK, a pick up artist’s main objective is pretty carnal, let’s be honest. So how do you position yourself in a way to maximise that opportunity. Answer: The power of your smile.
Smiling is a known method for primates to allow other primates they mean no harm. Here’s the bad news; you’re a primate! Any pick up artist knows that in order to pick up a beautiful woman, you need her defences down, not up. By giving a smile, you are immediately letting her know you mean no harm.
Another great advantage of smiling is that people cannot really help but smile back if someone smiles at them. So if you smile at your prospect she is more than likely to smile back. This will immediately give her a subconsious trigger to like you. Smart huh?
Now, when you have sorted yourself out and gone to have a chat with her, smiling regularly send lots of other signals to her. It tells her you are relaxed. If you have good teeth, it shows them off to her and this is no bad thing. Smiling a lot also brings levity, even when you are feeling down so wherever her levels of happiness are, your smile will raise them further and leave an enduring memory that you made her happier.
Other advantages to using your smile are that they indicate you like her which makes her feel better about herself. It is a silent compliment. It also indicates you like what she is saying and that you are a fun and positive guy. It also demonstrates that you are relaxed and that you are confident as well has having a good sense of humour.
Smiling is pretty much the single most powerful tool you have in your armoury and like any powerful weapon, it must be used with care!
Never, never, ever enter a room with a smile on you face. Never ever, ever ever, enter a room laughing. Your smile and your laugh are such powerful weapons, they must be deployed carefully and with purpose. Enter a room with a straight face and smile when you look at her and she knows that she was the one that caused your change. Enter a room grinning like an idiot and you will have to pull a different face to let her know you’ve seen her. Since smiling and laughter are the best weapons you have, anything else would be a downgrade and would send exactly the wrong message.
Take note!
Pick Up Artist Secrets: First Impressions
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Any pick up artist worth his salt knows the incredible importance of first impressions. They have an enormous impact on how we think of someone and how they think of us and they last long after we have met them for the first time.
For the really good pick up artist though there is much more to this than meets the eye. It is generally agreed among those who know what they are talking about, including scientists, that we have decided if we fancy some one within a minute and a half and four minutes from first meeting them.
This may not be so surprising but these following statistics may be:
- 55% of a person’s impression of us is based on our body language.
- 38% of their impression comes from the tone, speed and inflection of our voice.
- 7% of their impression comes from what we actually say to them.
To the inexperienced pick up artist this information is gold dust! Why? Because you can begin focusing on what is important and stop wasting time thinking that impressing a woman is all about coming up with a funny or clever line. This is not what being a good pick up artist is about. Rather it is about being confident and friendly in the way you walk and stand. It is about projecting your voice to ensure the woman can hear you and speaking in such a way that the woman can understand everything that you are saying. It is about talking in a way that allows her to feel comfortable and relaxed and not awkward and on edge.
So, if you want to be a good pick up artist don’t sweat the small stuff and focus on what is important.